In the end, we’re always doing what we believe will bring us the most happiness. Even when you “sacrifice” or “compromise” you’re still doing it because it brings you the most happiness compared to alternatives.
We simply call them sacrifices and compromises because we don’t take full responsibility for our choices. We don’t acknowledge that we’re doing it because it is what ultimately brings us the most happiness compared to alternatives.
Your parents raised you because it brought them the most happiness compared to alternatives. No sacrifice; it was in their best interests to do so. And it was the same thing their parents did for them; no need to guilt-trip their children about it.
If you chose to do 70% of the relationship work, it was because it was preferable to the alternatives, otherwise you wouldn’t have done it. No sacrifice.
Instead of keeping scoreboards with everyone, take full responsibility for your choices and acknowledge that everything that you do, you do it because it is the best choice compared to alternatives.
If you’re looking for someone to blame, there is no one to blame but yourself. If you feel things are unfair, you can always change them. You chose to be a parent and you also chose your partner. Own your choices and give them 100%.
”Man is nothing else but what he makes of himself. ― Jean-Paul Sartre
”Most people do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility, and most people are frightened of responsibility. ― Sigmund Freud
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